war machine-christy mack-tattoos
Happy couple War Machine with his girl Christy Mack. Photo courtesy @WarMachine170 on Twitter

I remember when War Machine (then it was Mr. Jon Koppenhaver) was the “whore machine”. I recall a conversation we had in 2009 when I asked him what he was into when he wasn’t training or fighting. He said:

“Really man, all my free time I spend trying to terrorize chicks. (laughs) I have like a super one track mind; all I wanna do is like train and fight and terrorize chicks. Really I’m the ‘whore machine’. My name is the ‘whore machine’ but people thought I was saying ‘war machine’. In my free time, if I had more money I would travel more. I enjoy traveling and seeing different stuff and exploring new chicks. I want to go around the world and conquer every chick. That’s all I like to do, it’s my favorite.”

That was then, but since that time War Machine picked up this little number named Christy Mack that has seemed to tame the beast. It does seem appropriate it would be a porn star to catch the heart of the “Whore Machine”. After all, he himself ventured into the adult film industry for a time.

Ms. Mack’s website describes her as, “a new porn starlet with a unique look and personality. This tattooed vixen is straight-edge but with an aggressive sex-drive and attitude.”

Well, so deeply in love is this couple that they have branded themselves with each other’s names. Forever. In ink. On their bodies. Christy’s tattoo reads, “Property of War Machine” and it’s on the back of her right shoulder as can been seen in the photo above.

As for War Machine, his stamp of love reads simply “MACK” in giant letters across his neck that will take a full blown turtle neck to cover up. That’s cool. Turtle necks are fine. For three months a year max! At least Christy can just put a shirt on if she wants.

But here’s my question. Forget what happens when you break up — I mean, not to be Debbie Downer, but there’s a just a slight chance this might not work out for the long run. Just sayin.

But not even talking about that, just what if you get in a fight? Every couple fights at some point and what happens when you just want to get away for a bit? You’re never getting away from that. Everywhere you go, everywhere you look you’re going to be reminded that you have this person’s name on your neck. Mostly because a) you will be looking in a mirror or b) you’re going to see someone and they ask, “Hey, who’s Mack?”

Not to mention, “Mack” is a dude’s name.

Here’s to happily ever after, guys.

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