In a past life Brock Lesnar was a viking warrior who wielded a 75 lb. battle axe like a switchblade. As evolution progressed and Lesnar was reborn to live out the karma of single-handedly spilling the blood of entire armies, he lived the life of a gunslinger in the wild west.

There are Apache legends about a white giant from the North who slayed a village of their warriors with a pair of six-shooters and ravished all the widow squaws in one evening. They called him Death Clutch.

Today in our civilized society fans from around the world watch as the fair-skinned warrior pummels opponents for sport. But flashes of his past can be seen whenever he gets out the guns and decides to whip up a salad.

One thing is for sure. He was never ever ever a cook in a past life. So this is how the man whips up a meal when the old lady is off shopping for shoes. He’s so tough he won’t even eat something called “fruit” unless he shoots it first.

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